Actually pretty Awesome!

I am preparing to enter the Center of My Garden! I put on the robe of humility and a smile, from my heart. The Holy Spirit is helping me. “I love you Lord, let me breathe you in this morning.” “Yes my love.” And he pulls me in. I place my head on his chest. “All is well, my love, you have done well. Do not turn back and do not fear. I have quieted your fear!” “Yes Lord, indeed, you have. I will do as you command!” “There is life in the garden and much work to do. Shall we begin?” “Oh yes Lord!” I am so excited that the Master Gardener wants to work with me another day!

1 Peter 4:14 If you are reproached for the name of Christ, blessed are you, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. On their part He is blasphemed, but on your part He is glorified.

It is amazing to me that as I have come to type this out, the night and it’s struggles have vanished. I remember as I tossed and turned a struggle in my heart and mind. It was difficult. I just kept trusting God and giving it over, but I remember it wouldn’t leave and didn’t get settled. What I do not remember is exactly what it was. This tells me that as the night ended and my morning has been spent, the Lord was leading me to resolve and has brought it to a close. How wonderful and faithful He is.

As I have been healing and growing out from under the narcissistic systems I was fully in, I am finding that I have had need of a lot of retraining. Beyond the narcissists there other things of course. One I want to talk about today is the flying monkeys. These can come in various forms. Thoughts must be retrained and religious ideas that were used and still are, to keep me bound, and people. Sometimes it can be even harder to let them go. The important thing is realizing that they are working for and with the narcissist and should not be trusted. So many teachings and mindsets and people get used to keep one from being set free completely. I believe this was part of my wrestle last night, but I still don’t quite remember, which is actually pretty awesome. I am having to be careful when I hear certain teachings or scriptures. I go to the Lord when I feel like I need to look back, tolerate or feel pressured or guilted into ignoring the truth. This happens all day for me. It hasn’t been easy, but it is simple. I am grateful that God is so patient. I need it. I have had to turn my patience toward others to myself.

I typed out the above paragraph before typing my encounter with the Master Gardener today. I realized as I typed the encounter out that it was what Jesus did and who he is for me that caused me to forget the struggle. I also want to tell you, the Lord asked me a few weeks ago to not only seek comfort and it is being revealed to me what that entails. I can not just fix some peoples actions and poor teachings etc. I can not just forgive and let things be. It won’t make a way out for me or others. I have to face the truth and some hardship. I can honestly say Jesus has been faithful to teach me. And I hope this truth brings you joy! It is so important that we know truth to get out of and be kept from the lies ahead.